Today, the third Monday of January, is commonly referred to as Blue Monday. It’s considered to be the most depressing day of the year. By this time people are feeling down because they have broken all their New Year’s resolutions and there’s still another week until pay day.

Day’s like this that receive a lot of coverage in the press can be both damaging and helpful to mental health awareness. They can harm mental health awareness by giving the impression that depression or other illnesses only happen on particular days, but they can be helpful by bringing conversations up with people. They can be helpful to highlight that every day can be a Blue Monday, it is not confined to a single Monday in January. Instead it can strike on any day, at any time. My Blue Monday’s have been on a Friday in December, a Monday in August, and a Tuesday in January. Each on years or months apart. What’s important to know is that they are all survivable.

If you are struggling with your own Blue Monday you’re not alone. People are there to help you, be they family, friends, or healthcare professionals. They all care about you. Don’t suffer in silence.

Part of my approach to the new year involved rediscovering one of my habits. I’ve been trying to write a blog post more often. I initially intended to use my Micro.blog and to post all my content there, but given the chance to reflect I realised I wanted my longer posts to live here. I’m not committing to a set number of posts per week, but I am committing to posting here more often.

All week I’ve been thinking about what to write about. Everytime I opened my iPad and sat down to write something I couldn’t think of anything to write. It started to become a problem. I wanted to write a post, but I didn’t know what to write. I wanted to write a post but I began to feel like I didn’t have anything to say. I wanted to write but I began to believe I didn’t have anything to say or write.

This is evening as I sat here recovering from my counselling session I was bumbling around on the internet. Something made me google a photographer whose blog I used to follow years ago. I even have one of his photos. To my delight I found his website and realised he was still blogging regularly. As I scrolled through his posts I came across one titled Stop hiding behind complexity. The first line struck me:

Whether we like to admit it or not, we sometimes enjoy making the simplest task more difficult because it's easier to blame the many loops it would have taken to finish it if we don't succeed.

I realised perhaps this is what I’m doing with my blog. I want to write a post but I think that I need to write something significant. Instead of sitting down to write something, be it about something I’ve read or done this week, I’m making the simple task complicated. The likelihood is that it’s easier to not post something and hide behind the thought that I have nothing to say than it is to open Obsidian and write until I’ve put something together worth posting. If I want to write for my blog more often, it should be as simple as writing a post and publishing it. No second guessing myself and no worrying about whether I have something to say. Just writing.

Over the years I’ve developed a few strategies to help get me in to the right frame of mind to work. One of the best ones is my time for work playlist, I put it on when I need to focus and it never fails to get me into the right state to focus on a project. I’ve worked out that the best albums for me to work to are film soundtracks. The nature of films means that they often build to a finale towards the end of the film, and the soundtracks have a big part to play in that. I find that as the urgency in the music builds my focus deepens and by the end of the soundtrack I’m immersed in my work.

Occasionally I’ll come across a new album that has a similar effect to the play list and I add it on the end. This week when I came across a new album I realised that it might be time to review the albums that I have in there. When I opened it up I had amassed over 6 hours worth of music. I realised it was time to review what albums I had saved, along with the fact that I rarely even got to the soundtracks at towards the end of the playlist.

Most of the time when I used this playlist it was to settle down to a block of work, generally in the afternoons when I have fewer meetings at work. That means a block of work a can last between 1 and 3 hours, so I really had no need for the amount of music that was in there. On a Wednesday afternoon work has implemented a no meetings policy, it means we have a consistent free block of time we can set aside for deep work, and my playlist gets used a lot on those afternoons.

When I assessed the albums that I had in there, I decided it was time to limit the length to about 3.5 hours of music. I picked my top 2 soundtracks and added in the new one to hit the magic length of time. I structured the playlist with the longest first moving to the shortest last. We travel through Dune, Tron Legacy, and The Dark Knight, which nicely breaks my work period into three chunks should I need to pause for a few minutes and move my legs. I’ve been using it this week and it’s working very well. If you’re interested here’s the Apple Music version for you.

One thing I want to do more of this year it to write. Back when I started blogging in 2005 or 2006 I used to post everyday, often more than once. It might have been the novelty of being able to write something and have it appear on the internet for people to read that made it easier. It might also have been that the blogging community was in full force at the time, but one thing is for certain it was my hobby and I enjoyed it.

Since those heady days of the my blog something has gone astray. It might have been that all the bloggers I followed at the time became “serious” about blogging. They made careers out of it, and it made me feel like I had to be “serious” as well. Twitter also had a large impact. A lot of people, myself included, became more focused on posting there than on their blogs. Sharing took place there, but it lacked the same feel. What I do know is that somewhere along the way the joy of blogging disappeared and I lost interest.

Over the years I’ve tried to kick start the habit again but it’s never lasted more than a couple of weeks. This Christmas I’ve had some time to think and reflect over the events of the last couple of years. One thing that has become clear is that I lack a hobby, something for myself, and I want a hobby as much as I’ve realised I need one. I’ve decided that one of my intentions this year is to blog more, to find my hobby again and write for me. I try to journal most days in Obsidian which helps my mental health, but I want my blog to be more. So I’m starting off in January with a simple goal. To post something at lest once a day. Whether it’s a thought, or a link, or a longer piece is irrelevant, I want to make the act of posting a habit again. Most importantly I want to find the joy of sharing again.